Malaysia 2, Singapore 0

Some of you may accuse me of being a foam-in-the-mouth, rabid Malaysian nationalist. Not entirely true, but I do like being Malaysian, and sometimes we Malaysians have this rivalry thing going with the brethren across the causeway.

So I am going to bring up an issue that's pretty old; almost a month old now.

A nice Malay Singaporean stand-up comic who goes by the stage name Fakkah Fuzz (I think he just wants to be able to say the word 'F*cker' on a frequent basis) made a joke about thieves.

Fakkah said Singapore Malays call a thief “pencuri” while Malaysian Malays call a thief “perdana menteri” (prime minister).

I had to laugh. The joke is hysterical, in my opinion. It is still making the rounds on my Facebook feed, when I checked just yesterday.

Naturally, the UMNO idiots terasa lah. They got pissed off and had their rant. (Note aside, did you know that your IQ drops by 30 points when you're angry? It's probably explains why UMNO tends not to make much sense.)

Anyway, things were going well until the Fakkah decided to apologise:

“I would like to sincerely apologize if I unintentionally hurt my brothers and sisters across the causeway. It was not my intention to hurt or cause unhappiness among anyone. Nor was I accusing anyone of anything.

“It was simply a joke based on current events. The joke is basically ‘we say this, you say this’.

“I’m just saying what I hear. Not saying ‘This person is guilty of this!’ Not at all. Please don’t take what I said out of context as I’m not out to slander anyone.”

Laaa.

There really was no need to apologise. Malaysia is not Singapore, and we don't launch defamation suits against the opposition and bankrupt them to stay in power.

(Mohon terasa, ye.)

Actually we probably do even more stupid things, so I take that back.

However. I want to point out that we have two Malaysian heroes.

One is Adam Adli, who was criticised for lowering the Malaysian flag. When asked to apologise, he said:

I will never apologise (to the prime minister). Since the thing had happened till today, now I am asked to apologise. I will never do that. How about my friends and the struggle?

I do not want my friends to be demoralised if I apologise. It is not that I will never apologise at all, as maybe someday I may have to say sorry to some people for my actions.

Absolute hero.

The other is Fahmi Reza. He was charged for depicting an image of Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak in clown makeup. Did he apologise?

Hell, no! He went out and did it a second time! I tell you, sometimes I am very proud to be Malaysian.

Anyway, you're wondering what happened to the Fakkah.

Despite his apology, Selangor Umno Youth chief Zainuri Zainal said it was too little too late, because Fakkah’s joke had a “deep impact” on Malaysians.

“Fakkah should look in the mirror first before trying to meddle in the current affairs of Malaysia,” Zainuri was quoted as saying by Berita Harian.

Minta maaf, ye, but sometimes, you just can't win.