The Truth Is Like Pink Bananas

When someone like Abdullah Ahmad Badawi claims that there are no threats against Anwar Ibrahim's life and that the government promises protection for him, there is only one suitable response that comes to mind:

Dude. Plug that hole.

And I'm referring to his mouth, and not the other end, lest you think I am suggesting he go get himself sodomised.

Though it wouldn't be a bad idea considering how sodomy has become so in vogue these days.

But I digress.

It astounds me that Pak Lah even bothers to declare assurances anymore. Everyone knows he lies as fluently as he snores.

Any occasion where Pak Lah utters the truth (even by accident) would be an occasion to celebrate. A moment to commemorate. Time to bring out the champagne and make a toast..

It would be as rare, unexpected, unbelievable - perhaps even confusing as, say ... pink bananas.


Now Pak Lah is either ignorant of the reputation he possesses, or in severe denial. I'd say the latter is a higher possibility.

It doesn't, however, stop him from getting offended when the USA stated that it would oppose any politically motivated investigation or prosecution against Anwar.

"The United States seems to harbour prejudice against us. The Government will not intervene in any investigation. The team carrying out the probe are professionals and they know their duties."

In your dreams. Liar.

There are no professionals left in the police force. The judiciary has its hands tied behind. This investigation is probably an exercise in futility.

I expect to see mattresses being brought to court again.

But Pak Lah cannot take the credit for being the biggest liar yet. Someone else takes the cake:

Malaysian deputy Prime Minister Najib Razak also assailed the American government for implying that the investigation could be biased.

"It is not politically motivated. The thought never even crossed our minds," he said.

I was still laughing 3 hours later.

As I said, the truth is like pink bananas.

Najib's Blow-Up Shot

He's really outdoing himself.


Who on earth is his public relations consultant/advisor???

Speaking Of Irresponsibility...

Another UMNO baboon attempts to jump on the PKR-failed-to-deliver-promises bandwagon.


I'm bewildered that they don't see the irony of making statements like this:

Muhammad said it was irresponsible to make a promise and then retract it.

Just like it is irresponsible to be covertly smuggling a huge amount of money out of the country, failing to declare it at the Australian customs and then feigning an inability to understand English?

"Some might even construe it as a breach of trust, an abuse of goodwill, because a lot of people might have voted for the opposition based on that promise," he said, adding that Barisan Nasional always made promises based on its ability to deliver them.

"Breach of trust"? Highly amusing, coming from this turnip.

Now I agree with him that Barisan Nasional always made promises based on its ability to deliver them.

Better transportation, less corruption, lower inflation etc..

Unfortunately, those promises were rarely delivered. They were merely substituted with assurances that everything was spiffy in Bolehland.

Triggering Trouble...

You'd think he'd know better than to pose like this..


It's a Bernama pic, taken during the Defence Services Asia Exhibition and Conference.

A "Lesson" To Voters

I don't usually stray into rabid sites like the NST, but since I was looking for more info on RPK (mistakenly thinking MSM might have more than I did), I decided to make an exception this time.

But I did stumble upon a priceless jewel. I don't know how this fool has the temerity to say this with a straight face. I'd have doubled over and cracked up.


You'd think that with the dumb stunts he's pulled of late, he'd be trying to lay low and hope no one has any memory of him.

But no.

Read the entire article:

Datuk Seri Najib Razak said the failure of Selangor would be an "eye-opener and a lesson" to voters.

He said the Federal government had long predicted that opposition parties would have difficulty fulfilling their promises made in the general election.

Najib was referring to Selangor Menteri Besar Tan Sri Abdul Khalid Ibrahim's announcement on Monday that the state government was not in a position to reduce quit rent by 20 per cent as promised in the Parti Keadilan Rakyat election manifesto.

The state government will, instead, be giving incentives so that people settle their arrears.

Khalid had also said that a study was being carried out to determine whether it would be apt to reduce the quit rent since the state's economy was not growing at the desired rate, land prices were high and housing projects were ongoing.

Najib said people were often taken in by promises of lower taxes.

"During the elections, anyone can make promises," he said, adding that he hoped that people would realise that what was important was not the promises but how likely they were to be kept.

"We must have the maturity and the wisdom to decide for ourselves."

Higher Education Minister Datuk Seri Mohamed Khaled Nordin also criticised the Selangor government for making promises it could not keep.

He said this was the obvious difference between the Pakatan Rakyat, which took a populist approach to gain popular support, and the ruling Barisan Nasional, which had experience in government and only made responsible promises.

Khaled was speaking after officiating the opening of the International Conference On Educational Innovation, jointly organised by Universiti Malaya and the Malaysian National Commission for Unesco (United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organisation) in Kuala Lumpur.

"If they bring down the rates, how can they ensure that quality standards within the jurisdiction of the various local authorities are maintained?" Khaled asked, adding that the opposition's promise of free education for all was unrealistic.

"If funds are channelled towards financing free education, and not enough is allocated to develop the economy, graduates won't be able to get jobs."

I'm not sure how many of you out there have read The Onion.

It claims to be America's Finest News Source (probably is, too) and revolves around the most bizarre of satire. It's often irreverent, sometimes provocative and occasionally profane.

Now I keep getting the feeling that aliens have abducted the original editors of our mainstream media and replaced them with foam-in-the-mouth satirists which could make Onionists pale in comparison.

Because there's no way in hell that NORMAL Malaysians could take the NST seriously.

Najib must be in serious denial about the situation of Barisan Nasional.

As for the Opposition, I did glance through their manifesto briefly. But I don't really care about free education. Nor am I seriously worried about the amount of tax I pay since Malaysia ranks rather low when it comes to taxation.

But I care about what my children are being taught. I don't want the likes of the keris-wielder involved in my child's education. And I'd like my tax money to be spent wisely.

For instance, I'm not too fond of C4 explosives being authorised to eliminate random Mongolian models. C4 explosives are not cheap.

He said this was the obvious difference between the Pakatan Rakyat, which took a populist approach to gain popular support, and the ruling Barisan Nasional, which had experience in government and only made responsible promises.

I'm sick of being lied to by the ruling coalition that the withdrawal of the fuel subsidy is going to fund the improvement of road transportation.

Or that we're forced to pay higher toll prices for better road maintenance.

Or that the price of cooking oil, sugar, flour and now rice have gone up significantly but we should tighten our budget and adjust our lifestyle.

Or that we should adapt to rock bottom minimum wages.

Those are cheap words and empty promises. We have too much maturity and wisdom to put up with it.